Cincinnati News Network--08/06/2046

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markthemexican
Posts: 14
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2019 11:46 am

Cincinnati News Network--08/06/2046

Post by markthemexican »

Cincinnati News Network--Your trusted local news for the Cincinnati region

August 6, 2046:


New owner of the Cincinnati Raptors:

The eccentric real estate mogul and reality TV star, Ronald Drumpf, announced this morning on the social media platform DimWittr that he had purchased the Cincinnati Raptors professional baseball team:
"After long negotiations with the Duke Snider League, I have officially purchased the Cincinnati Raptors effective IMMEDIATELY! The great state of Cincinatti will once again have a GREAT baseball team. We are going to make baseball GREAT again!! I have put in place the very talented Mark DeSantos (I know all the best people). With my amazing business skills and DeSantos managing the day-to-day operations, the Cincinnati Raptors will surely win the World Series this year."

Asked for clarification, Drumpf's press secretary could not be reached for further comment.

In national news:

Are We Living in a Simulation?

Harvard Scientists this morning have released a study claiming that we may be living in a computer-simulated reality. The study, considered highly controversial, has been ongoing for years. Critics, however, claim there is no scientific evidence whatsoever of any simulated reality.
LTJaeger
Posts: 457
Joined: Sun Oct 01, 2017 2:08 pm

Re: Cincinnati News Network--08/06/2046

Post by LTJaeger »

LOL!
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